I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
