Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize