Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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