Where did you get a picture of my penis
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
