not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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