you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
