So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
