He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
