And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
