Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
