big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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