so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
