Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
bring money and cleavage
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Randomize
