you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
