ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Randomize
