Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
