just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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