I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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