ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I look excited, but its just a facade.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
