woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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