Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
