an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize