NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Randomize
