Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I think my moral compass just broke
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize