apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Randomize
