sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
pop tarts are not kleenex
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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