He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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