super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Another day, another engagement, another cat
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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