last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
