who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
