Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
