I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
