The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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