so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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