i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
