who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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