is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
