We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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