U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
