I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
We're too hungover to prance.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
