I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
