Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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