dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
