dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
