the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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