Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
