Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
