Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
True strength comes from lack of pants
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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