There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
