i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
